Psychologist Discovers 4 Signs Of An Impending Divorce
Relationships are hard work. We already know that. We also know that 50% of all marriages end in divorce. However, John Gottman, the American Psychologist, has studied the nature of relationships and divorce and he believes that there are four major signs that one must look out for. He calls these “The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.”
Do go through these signs of divorce so that you know how to deal with them!
1. When you start ignoring and avoiding conflict
Symptom: Things always get messy in relationships. Partners are bound to argue and fight with each other. However, if your response is to ignore those arguments and run away instead, you are running away from the marriage and straight into divorce.
Solution: Tackle issues and arguments as and when they come up. Don’t let them build up.
2. Constant criticism
Symptom: You or your partner grows increasingly annoyed by every little thing you do. Every small eccentricity or habit is an opportunity to segue into picking at each others faults, even bringing up past arguments into the fold.
Solution: Do not be aggressive, and don’t let small actions become a commentary on your partner’s personality at large. Furthermore, restrict your criticism to that one action alone, and don’t let it blow out of proportion.
3. Getting defensive
Symptom: You feel like you’ve made a mistake somewhere, but instead of owning up to it, you get defensive or aggressive and start blaming the other person. You project your own faults and insecurities at them, and thus make a big mess of a situation that could have been manageable.
Solution: You need to learn to take responsibility for your own actions and apologize for it. A little apology goes a long way.
Symptom: You and your partner don’t respect each other, and you constantly humiliate each other in private and in public. Your only intent is to make the other person feel bad, and in the process you both end up with low self-esteem.
Solution: You need to be empathetic. You need to look at things from each others’ perspectives. If they’re hurt, or if they’re being aggressive, try and find out why that is so, instead of simply nursing your own wounds. If you want to avoid divorce then you have to learn to be on each other’s team, instead of playing against each other.
What do you think about these signs of divorce? Do COMMENT down below and SHARE these solutions to an impending divorce with everyone you know!